What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 18.06.2025 06:06
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Why are women attracted to ugly guys?
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Why do many women wear sleeveless shirts, more so than men?
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
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Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Why did my ex move on so quickly?
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
How do you weigh in on the Vance-couch conversation?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
If women aren't shallow, why do most tall, good-looking men have girlfriends?
TEXT:
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Which Shakespeare words have completely changed meaning in modern English?
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Make Nazis afraid again!
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Why does it itch on my vulva, uterus, and sides of my vagina, but it doesn't itch inside the vagina?
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.